States breath new life into Cap & Trade

David Paterson New York Governor

NY Governor David Paterson

Just when you thought it was safe to exhale – it’s back, bigger than ever. What’s back you ask? Why, cap and trade. And it’s coming to a state near you. Even though 30 thousand or so scientists say CO2 emissions aren’t really harmful and in fact are probably good for the environment; your government is not taking any chances with your health! So, they’re going to slap those evil businesses with cap and trade just to make sure you stay extra healthy!

And this is really cool: state governments are joining in with the federal government (EPA) to give companies the ole one-two punch. I can’t wait till we have nice CO2-less air to breath as we recline in government housing somewhere. Why government housing? Because we won’t have jobs anymore so we gotta live somewhere, don’t we? But who cares as long as we don’t have excess CO2. Psst, don’t tell anyone that plants absorb and thrive on CO2. That’s a secret!

From New York comes this heartwarming story of a bankrupt state with a truly caring group of government bureaucrats. Those evil power plants, the ones that deliver electricity to residents and businesses in NY have been ‘convinced’ by state thugs in the NYSDEC to purchase carbon credits in a cap and trade scheme.

This has raised $213 Million dollars to fight all that bad global warming in New York. And each year, these power plants must lower emissions or face penalties. Of course, they also must spend millions to update their equipment to lower emissions. And happy NY residents and businesses will gladly pay the extra $213 million dollars plus plant upgrade fees to lower CO2 emissions! Hey – we’re all in this together!

Now what will NY do with these new contributions from caring citizens and businesses? From the TimesUnion.com, “$112 million for Gov. David Paterson’s green jobs legislation adopted last fall, and $177 million for energy audits and energy-efficiency installation measures in homes and businesses. “

Hmm, let’s see. $112 Million dollars for green jobs legislation. We all know what that means. It’s your money funneled into green companies operating in the red ever since the American people figured out that global warming is a big hoax. So, the compassionate state of New York is using the power of government to grab from one group of profit making businesses and donate to green (uh red) losers. This should warm Al Gore’s heart and help his stock portfolio. He gets the dividend checks and NY residents get the shaft – uh I mean clean air! It’s a beautiful thing!

$177 million dollars for energy audits and other government meddling make work projects. Anyone with any brains should leave NY as fast as they can sell their house.

But hold on a minute, the TimesUnion goes on to report, “In October, the governor raided $90 million from RGGI to balance the state budget, a step that outraged the environmental community.” Oops…  turns out there was a better use for those cap and trade dollars after all. Will New Yorkers survive? Stay tuned, you’ll be asking them personally when you find them living next door.

Next installment: learn how the unconstitutional soviet style agency, EPA, does Obama’s dirty work for him. Coming up soon.

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3 Comments

Filed under Environment, Socialism

3 responses to “States breath new life into Cap & Trade

  1. The Senator

    Wow! You just keep putting out masterpieces. Your skill surpasses those of seasoned veterans. God bless you!

  2. Pingback: Tweets that mention States breath new life into Cap & Trade « Writeheiney -- Topsy.com

  3. Deborah Lanier

    Great post. Please add me to your mailing list for future posts.

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